Sometimes it's challenging to stop being the Good Girl. Why is that?
I am currently part of a marvelous class in entrepreneurship, and I made a request to make a change of mentors because the one assigned to me did not seem to really "get" me, and I felt he looked down on and disrespected me, which is not acceptable. Changing mentors is not a big deal, but in this case I ran right into resistance. And it was perfect that it happened this way!
One or two individuals found themselves challenged by my request, and because I received push back from people who I respect, I found allllll of my Good Girl messages coming up and flooding my brain:
**Oh, it's okay, just stick with the first mentor; it'll be fine. Just suck it up**
**You're going to ruin your standing with these people! Back down!**
**You're being too picky and too pushy - just deal with it.**
It took me a couple of days to get through this and back to a sense of groundedness and empowerment. During those days, I asked myself questions:
"Are you being unreasonable, Lori?" No.
"Is this a mature request, or a childish request?" Mature
"How are you feeling?" Guilty
"Is there any practical reason you should feel guilty?" No. Not really. No.
"Can you sit with this feeling and see how it all unfolds?" Yeah; not thrilled with it, but yes.
And you know what happened? I stuck with my normal professionalism in all of my communications and attitudes and actions, and it all came out right in the end. I got a new mentor who is fantastic and respectful of me, and we have all moved on.
Best of all, I walked through another situation that "breaks The Rules" and I discovered just how much more strength I have as a result of that effort.
Plus, I got this blog out of it! 😉
Entrepreneur, Actor, Speaker and Rebellious Game-Changer - that's me. I coach women, helping them recognize, understand and break out of the social "shoulds" to become empowered, powerful and masterful communicators, on stage and off.