The Freedom Chronicle!
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“Good Girls” Follow the Rules
Do you like rules? Sometimes yes, sometimes no, right? Depends on the rules! If they help you move forward, or set you free, bring ‘em on!
Rules are useful for things like how to drive a car or how to interview successfully, but when it comes to laboring under rules that keep us doubting ourselves, feeling fearful of our natural right to speak up and be visible, well we can tend to wonder if we’ll ever be able to break free!
We can. I’m living proof. I was cemented into a “Good Girl” mode from childhood. The little girl who would get her praise from smiling, being gracious, bringing food and drinks to adults at her parents’ parties, it took a long while to understand where my strengths as a person – communication and interpersonal connection – differed from those “Good Girl” rules that kept me in a self-imposed subservient position!
This short list of “Good Girl” rules that I was saddled with will seem very familiar to you:
The fact is that women (and men too) are taught how to do things “right”. What we are not taught is how to BE! And we are certainly not taught how to be free, nor to connect. emotionally. And emotion is not only a central human mode of being, it is something that women are both recognized and taken to task for.
We are not taught to accept, admire and honor ourselves!
We are not taught to reach out to one another in our transparency, our deep emotional truths, and our authenticity!
We are not taught to stand behind our own dreams!
Without that kind of learning, we end up using a lot of energy fighting the ghosts of our fears, instead of engaging, honoring, and enjoying our strengths!
We need to identify and begin using our natural strengths as women and as individuals.
We need to understand the Good Girl Rules so that we can see the “prison” we are in.
We need to calculate the impact of these rules so that we can choose to leave them behind.
We need to understand and start utilizing our modes of escape! Together!
So let’s get to it!
***************************************************************************************************
Three “Good Girl” Rules, and Three “Good Girl Project” Truths To Set Us Free
There’s nothing like fear, uncertainty, insecurity to make us stomp on our personal Stop Pedals. But we can hit that Go Pedal with passion, and move forward at greater speed when we feel self-confident, sure of what we know and who we are in our strengths.
No matter how much empowerment work you have done, there is always the possibility of some situation bringing up those dreaded thoughts of resistance or inability: “I don’t know how!”, or “I don’t have enough power / money / permission / approval to do this!”, or “I need more education/training/self-confidence before I try!”
We need tools to take back our permission and approval and give those precious commodities to ourselves.
“Good Girls” Follow the Rules
Do you like rules? Sometimes yes, sometimes no, right? Depends on the rules! If they help you move forward, or set you free, bring ‘em on!
Rules are useful for things like how to drive a car or how to interview successfully, but when it comes to laboring under rules that keep us doubting ourselves, feeling fearful of our natural right to speak up and be visible, well we can tend to wonder if we’ll ever be able to break free!
We can. I’m living proof. I was cemented into a “Good Girl” mode from childhood. The little girl who would get her praise from smiling, being gracious, bringing food and drinks to adults at her parents’ parties, it took a long while to understand where my strengths as a person – communication and interpersonal connection – differed from those “Good Girl” rules that kept me in a self-imposed subservient position!
This short list of “Good Girl” rules that I was saddled with will seem very familiar to you:
- Be good
- Be nice
- Make sure you are liked, and likeable
- Be physically attractive, or no one will like/love you
- Don’t be too visible
- Don’t expect too much of yourself
- Don’t be too opinionated
- Put others first
The fact is that women (and men too) are taught how to do things “right”. What we are not taught is how to BE! And we are certainly not taught how to be free, nor to connect. emotionally. And emotion is not only a central human mode of being, it is something that women are both recognized and taken to task for.
We are not taught to accept, admire and honor ourselves!
We are not taught to reach out to one another in our transparency, our deep emotional truths, and our authenticity!
We are not taught to stand behind our own dreams!
Without that kind of learning, we end up using a lot of energy fighting the ghosts of our fears, instead of engaging, honoring, and enjoying our strengths!
We need to identify and begin using our natural strengths as women and as individuals.
We need to understand the Good Girl Rules so that we can see the “prison” we are in.
We need to calculate the impact of these rules so that we can choose to leave them behind.
We need to understand and start utilizing our modes of escape! Together!
So let’s get to it!
***************************************************************************************************
Three “Good Girl” Rules, and Three “Good Girl Project” Truths To Set Us Free
There’s nothing like fear, uncertainty, insecurity to make us stomp on our personal Stop Pedals. But we can hit that Go Pedal with passion, and move forward at greater speed when we feel self-confident, sure of what we know and who we are in our strengths.
No matter how much empowerment work you have done, there is always the possibility of some situation bringing up those dreaded thoughts of resistance or inability: “I don’t know how!”, or “I don’t have enough power / money / permission / approval to do this!”, or “I need more education/training/self-confidence before I try!”
We need tools to take back our permission and approval and give those precious commodities to ourselves.
