What Does It Really Mean: To Believe In Yourself?

I am the kind of person who needs to understand what a good idea or stirring sentiment really means for me. It's the only way I can take that stirring sentiment and turn it into a useful, practical, forward-moving aspect in my daily life!

And when I first heard something along this line of "believe in yourself", I had gone so far into my own social conditioning that I had to ask myself what that meant. Truth is, I had 

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made an awful lot of mistakes, and I'd been confused and stumped an awful lot. Who was this "yourself" I was supposed to believe in? Was it really this mistake-making, confused-too-often woman?

That didn't seem right, somehow. 

But it was.

When I thought about it - which I did for many years, looking for the answer that would satisfy - I had to come down on the side of a few things:

1. No one else can be me. So, no matter what I do, it must be a part of the fabric of this unique life force called Lori; "God don't make no junk."
2. How in the name of Harry Potter am I supposed to learn if I don't make mistakes??? (Okay, I still don't like makin' 'em, but hey, this is some truth up in here!)
3. The only alternative to believing in myself is to kick the spit out of myself, and that's no fun.

So, apparently, I'm not supposed to be invisible, perfect, nor devoid of personality.

Damn. 

I was so hoping to be traditional, to fit in, to go with society's flow!

Oops, there goes that social conditioning again.

Social conditioning is not a very nice sort of companion. it tells you and me really mean things like:

1. You're not good enough.
2. You're supposed to talk like that woman, look like that woman - not like you!
3. Youre supposed to submerge your wisdom and needs and just believe what successful people advise, because, well,  hey, they're successful!
4. You can't fufill your dream of actually making a living doing what you love, because nobody just works doing what they love!

Super fun, right? Not so much. Especially #2, which is the polar opposite of "believ in yourself".

So, without all of those hideous thoughts and practices, we're left with the alternative, which is far better.

Apparently I am supposed to be me (and you, you!) - flawed, creative, full of my own kind of personality, eager to grow and learn and share. Well, now that's a challenge! And I need community to maintain my efforts, so I continue to build community.

Believing in yourself...believing that you are fine just as you are and that you do not, in fact, have to measure up to anyone else, nor they to you...believing in your ability to grow and change, and to get the help to do that. Believing that you have the innate wisdom to walk your own way...

Priceless!