I am the kind of person who needs to understand what a good idea or stirring sentiment really means for me. It's the only way I can take that stirring sentiment and turn it into a useful, practical, forward-moving aspect in my daily life!
And when I first heard something along this line of "believe in yourself", I had gone so far into my own social conditioning that I had to ask myself what that meant. Truth is, I had
made an awful lot of mistakes, and I'd been confused and stumped an awful lot. Who was this "yourself" I was supposed to believe in? Was it really this mistake-making, confused-too-often woman?
That didn't seem right, somehow.
But it was.
When I thought about it - which I did for many years, looking for the answer that would satisfy - I had to come down on the side of a few things:
So, apparently, I'm not supposed to be invisible, perfect, nor devoid of personality.
I was so hoping to be traditional, to fit in, to go with society's flow!
Oops, there goes that social conditioning again.
Social conditioning is not a very nice sort of companion. it tells you and me really mean things like:
Super fun, right? Not so much. Especially #2, which is the polar opposite of "believ in yourself".
So, without all of those hideous thoughts and practices, we're left with the alternative, which is far better.
Apparently I am supposed to be me (and you, you!) - flawed, creative, full of my own kind of personality, eager to grow and learn and share. Well, now that's a challenge! And I need community to maintain my efforts, so I continue to build community.
Believing in yourself...believing that you are fine just as you are and that you do not, in fact, have to measure up to anyone else, nor they to you...believing in your ability to grow and change, and to get the help to do that. Believing that you have the innate wisdom to walk your own way...
Emotional Linguist™ and Feminine Face of Leadership Coach for Mission-Driven Businesswomen and Entrepreneurs, Lori is a rabble-rouser for women leaders, the host of Awake TV Network's show, "Goodbye Good Girl: The Feminine Face of Leadership", and author of The Human Solution: The Feminine Face of Business.
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Do you like the idea of breaking those social "should's" that have held you back for too long? Do you like the idea of successfully changing your modes of communication, your business structures, your self-image, and to your quality of life?
Lori Kirstein, Founder
The Goodbye Good Girl™ Project LLC
The Feminine Face of Business
Cincinnati, OH 45205