The Wedding Toast Client

Her best friend was about to get married, and she wanted to surprise her at the reception but was absolutely clueless about making it work.

Her intention was marvelous: She wanted to somehow sneak up to the stage with the new husband but hide him behind her. She would get to the mic and announce that a singer was making a special appearance and then he would step forward and the band would play their favorite song and he would start singing.

His new bride would not expect him to be singing anywhere out in public, so this would be a lovely gift.

We had to be tactical about how and when she would get up on stage and how she would get him up there.

Once that was taken care of, we had to talk about how she would introduce him, how she would feel comfortable, how she would feel the least nervous possible.

For most people, I have found that creating what actors call a "through line" of storytelling makes remembering what they want to say more fluid and more memorable. Memorization is awfully tough to carry off when you're feeling really frightened; your brain just doesn't engage the same way it does when you're calm.

Instead, what we did is determine the stepping stones  of her talk, one leading obviously to the next so that she could speak with self-confidence.

Her nervousness was something else again; she had it in her mind that this was a part of her personality.  Certainty about our identity is the biggest thing that can delay progress with public speaking and confidence. If you are certain that this is your personality and that you cannot change it, the only thing that will shift this is experience.

That is why when I work with clients, I get them on their feet and helping them experience something completely different than their "norm". This opens their options not just as a public speaker but as an individual with many more options in their lives - both personal and professional.

Good stuff!